Curious, Healing » domestic violence

“Tender Morsels” by Margo Lanagan

Sonia Connolly — Fri, 04 May 2012 05:23:31 +0000

Recommended by: Meloukhia

This is a fairy tale, but no child’s story. It starts with incest and pregnancy and abortion, and continues with gang rape. Then Liga is magically placed in a world that matches her heart’s desire, peaceful and safe.

While examining the consequences of assault and the consequences of avoiding trauma, the story sings along, full of prickly, kind characters and vivid details.

Recommended, for a true look at life in fairy tale guise.

An interview with Margo Lanagan.

Jody Hewgill (the cover artist)’s portfolio.

Available at Powell’s Books.

“Staying Fat for Sarah Byrnes” by Chris Crutcher

Sonia Connolly — Fri, 08 Jan 2010 05:09:45 +0000

Recommended by: Tess Alfonsin

A hard-edged book for teens that takes on multiple tough issues:

Children’s cruelty to each other for being fat or disfigured
What it’s like to grow up fat or disfigured
Surviving parental abuse and abandonment
Abortion
Hypocrisy
Religious intolerance by some Christians

While I applaud the author’s courage in addressing all these important issues, I think the book would have been stronger with at least one fewer sub-plot and more attention to characterization. The major teen characters showed some complexity, but the adults were either all-good or all-bad.

I was caught up in the plot and characters until the book suddenly turned into a thriller with a violent climax. I felt tricked into reading something far more violent than I expected or enjoyed.

I’m glad teens are reading and thinking about all the issues in this book. I wish the issues weren’t packaged with a violent, all-good/all-bad wrapper.

Available at Powell’s Books.

“It’s My Life Now: Starting Over After an Abusive Relationship or Domestic Violence” by Meg Kennedy Dugan & Roger R. Hock

Sonia Connolly — Fri, 09 Jan 2009 02:33:53 +0000

A how-to manual on starting over after leaving an abusive relationship.

This is a well-organized, well-written book for the survivor of an abusive relationship. Common myths, such as, “Anyone who could love an abusive partner must have a serious psychological problem,” are addressed and corrected in each chapter

Topics covered in the book include:

Types of abuse, including sexual abuse within a relationship
Assessing and ensuring safety after leaving
Grief for the loss of the relationship
Practical aspects of making a living after leaving

While the authors follow the usual convention of assuming a female survivor and male perpetrator through most of the book, I was glad to see a chapter about gay, lesbian, and transgender relationships and male survivors.

The book is written to “you” the survivor, which led to a feeling of overwhelm and intrusion for me as I read. While the book is written with sensitivity and sympathy, the style also conveys an underlying assumption that the authors understand the experience of being abused better than the reader. This undermines what I see as the most important task of an abuse survivor – regaining trust in one’s internal experience.

This book is a useful resource for anyone working with or supporting survivors of domestic violence and abuse.

Available at Powell’s Books.