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Curious, Healing

Curious, Healing

Books about healing, business, and fun

  • About Sonia Connolly

memoir

“Hospicing Modernity” by Vanessa Machado de Oliveira

February 4, 2026 by Sonia Connolly Leave a Comment

book cover
Subtitle: Facing Humanity’s Wrongs and the Implications for Social Activism
Recommended to me by: Amy Bennett

This book is a brilliantly written educational tool, including full transparency about the techniques it is using to bring the reader new ideas in the face of very sophisticated defenses. The first few chapters earnestly present the risks of reading the rest of the book, and offer practices to remain grounded and centered while reading stories that question basic assumptions about our reality.

Vanessa Machado de Oliviera uses stories from her own life as a mixed-race person in South America who now works in academia, in addition to deep political analysis to describe the twists and tricks of modernity, the way it consumes us and alters our thinking so that it seems inevitable and unquestionable. She uses metaphors and exercises to encourage new ideas to take root.

One of the exercises is to imagine oneself as a bus with varied passengers, and to pay attention to who is driving, who is giving suggestions to the driver, and who is in the back of the bus, not directly affecting the choice of direction, but still present. She asks, where is modernity on your bus, and what does it have to say.

I thought about that as I biked to an errand, and at first modernity seemed very distant. Then I realized it is standing by the driver and talking constantly about what I’ve done wrong and how I need to be productive and earn enough to deserve to live, etc. etc.

Modernity is tricky and slippery and we’ve all been steeped in it, so even when we think we have renounced and defeated it, we are engaging in battles and black & white thinking that are part of it. Thus we want to honor it both outside and inside ourselves as it goes through its death throes and makes way for something new that is hopefully more nourishing and healthy for us all.

I got this book from the library, but I think I need to buy a copy. It is a book to sit with and revisit and go back to. Highly recommended

Author’s website including videos of the author discussing her work.

Available at bookshop.org.

Filed Under: nonfiction Tagged With: activism, anti-racism, feminism, leadership, memoir, politics, psychology, spirituality, survival story, trauma

“How We Show Up” by Mia Birdsong

November 30, 2025 by Sonia Connolly Leave a Comment

book cover
Subtitle: Reclaiming Family, Friendship, and Community
Recommended to me by: Nora Samaran

This is a deeply hopeful book grounded in research and personal stories. The American Dream of individualism, resource extraction, and white supremacy creates separation and suffering. Mia Birdsong explores alternatives that people have created to value connection, cooperation, and community.

As a Black woman, Mia centers Black, queer women and other marginalized people such as people who have experienced homelessness. She appreciates the connections that people weave while surviving oppression, that can lead us all in a direction of ending oppression.

While the American Dream says that we should get our needs met in heterosexual nuclear families, this book celebrates all the different kinds of friendship that can also meet needs for intimacy, safety, and mutual support. Raising kids is easier and healthier for everyone with a larger circle of responsible and trusted adults. People who are ageing can support one another.

Whether in crisis, celebration, or everyday life, we can all weave more connections in our lives where we are seen and loved for who we are.

Highly recommended!

Author’s website. It turns out Mia Birdsong lives right here in Oakland!

Available at bookshop.org.

Filed Under: nonfiction Tagged With: activism, anti-racism, communication, feminism, healing, lgbt, memoir, politics, psychology, relationship, survival story

“What It Takes to Heal” by Prentis Hemphill

November 16, 2025 by Sonia Connolly Leave a Comment

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Subtitle: How transforming ourselves can change the world

I had to return this to the library before I finished the last few chapters, but it all rang true to me, with clear analysis of the effects of racism and trauma, and clear calls to action for the ways we can move forward and heal the damage. Making the world a better place requires both internal healing and external connections. The organizations working toward social justice struggle with healing the ways people interact with each other inside the organizations as well as taking action out in the world.

Prentis includes stories about their experiences with racism, as well as their experiences with organizing for a better world.

Highly recommended.

Author website: prentishemphill.com

Available at bookshop.org.

Filed Under: nonfiction Tagged With: activism, anti-racism, bodywork, feminism, healing, lgbt, memoir, politics, psychology, trauma

“Surviving Domestic Violence” by Elaine Weiss

September 8, 2025 by Sonia Connolly Leave a Comment

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Subtitle: Voices of Women Who Broke Free
Recommended to me by: Finding it in a Little Free Library

A compassionate and thorough look at how women get ensnared into abusive relationships with men, and how they get themselves out. Elaine Weiss includes her own story. She clarifies repeatedly that the abuse is not the victim/survivor’s fault, and there is no “type” of woman that is more vulnerable. Any woman can get into a relationship with an abusive person, and that’s what creates an abusive relationship.

The book was published in 2000, which only partially excuses its heterosexual and gendered lens. Yes, many abusive relationships are men abusing women. And some are not. This book could have also addressed queer relationships and women abusers in at least one of its examples.

The stories are also strongly biased toward the women finding loving marriages after leaving the abusive relationships. This supports the point that it’s not the women’s fault, but also pushes the narrative that a positive relationship is the ultimate goal and measure of success in healing.

It took me a long time to start reading the book after picking it up. And I did skim a couple of the stories where I didn’t want to read about the verbal abuse the woman was enduring. The bewildered teen looking around to see if anyone will tell her the abuse is wrong and not her fault breaks my heart. But I’m glad I did finally read the book. It is a great resource for people who carry stereotypes about who gets abused and why, both as bystanders and as people who have been abused themselves.

Available via Biblio.com.

Filed Under: nonfiction Tagged With: domestic violence, healing, memoir, relationship, trauma

“Somebody I Used to Know” by Wendy Mitchell

March 3, 2025 by Sonia Connolly Leave a Comment

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Subtitle: A Memoir
Recommended to me by: a friend

Wendy Mitchell is a vibrant, strong, smart woman, proud of her memory, her home renovations, and her two now-adult daughters whom she raised on her own. At age 57, she starts to feel fatigued and confused, and falls unexpectedly several times while running.

She has what appears to be a small stroke, and is diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer’s soon afterward at age 58. She is determined to remain independent as long as possible and uses multiple alarms on her iPad throughout her day to remind her to do tasks like make food, and then eat the food she made.

After being forced to retire from her beloved NHS job for ill health, she becomes an activist for people with dementia, participating in research and giving talks on her experience. She has to write out her talks in advance, map out her travels by public transit, and print photos of where she’ll be staying.

The book is absorbing on the level of getting to know Wendy and her story, as well as on the level of learning more about the effects of Alzheimer’s and how to live well after being diagnosed.

Highly recommended.

She wrote two books after this one and kept a blog, Which Me Am I Today.

Available at bookshop.org.

Filed Under: nonfiction Tagged With: aging, disability, memoir, psychology, survival story

“Writing Down the Bones” by Natalie Goldberg

March 2, 2024 by Sonia Connolly Leave a Comment

book cover
Subtitle: Freeing the Writer Within

Recommended to me by: finding it in a little free library

Natalie Goldberg combines writing practice and Zen practice in short chapters where she shares about her own writing adventures, and repeatedly admonishes the reader (or herself) to just sit down and write. I appreciated her ongoing willingness to sink into the depths of herself and write whatever showed up. The book veers between writing exercises, Zen wisdom, and her anxiety about eating too many brownies.

“A writer’s job is to make the ordinary come alive, to awaken to the specialness of simply being.”

“If you give yourself over to honesty in your practice, it will permeate your life.”

“We are good, and when our work is good, it is good. We should acknowledge it and stand behind it.”

I wonder if this book would have landed differently for me if I had read it when I was still writing and sending out an article each month. Since writing is not something I’m trying to make a living at, I don’t have the urgency or intensity around it that this book speaks to.

Recommended for people wrestling with being a writer as an identity, a practice, and/or a career.

Available at bookshop.org.

Filed Under: nonfiction Tagged With: memoir, spirituality, writing

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