Curious, Healing

Books about healing, business, and fun

“Attracting Perfect Customers – The Power of Strategic Synchronicity” by Stacey Hall & Jan Brogniez

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The guiding metaphor of this book is a lighthouse, which is most effective when it is standing firm in one place shining a light for ships at sea, but would wreck navigational havoc if it were running up and down the beach looking for ships.

In the same way, Hall and Brogniez propose that businesses are most effective when they stand firm and offer what they do best, rather than frantically trying to discover and adapt to what the market wants. Energy is put into defining and seeking a good match, and realigning or releasing bad matches.

When I define the perfect customer for my business as someone who already appreciates what I do best, it frees me to be more authentic in my marketing, and to focus on my strengths. It’s a much more relaxing way to run a business.

There are many exercises in the book to support this new way of thinking. I liked their suggestion to view improving but suboptimal results as a “preview of coming attractions.” Instead of focusing on what didn’t work, focus on what did work, and trust that the situation will continue to improve.

In a similar spirit, I appreciated the useful advice in this book, and skimmed over the client stories of instant results. I believe in synchronicity, especially after taking the time to specify what is needed, but in my experience the Universe’s response can sometimes be slow or mysterious. Expecting instant results does not contribute to my peace of mind.

Available at bookshop.org.

“The Wise Heart – A Guide to the Universal Teachings of Buddhist Psychology” by Jack Kornfield

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Jack Kornfield, an experienced American meditation teacher, combines Buddhist philosophy, meditation exercises, and stories about his students and himself into a thorough introduction to Buddhist psychology.

The Buddhist therapeutic techniques for resolving trauma are strikingly similar to Somatic Experiencing techniques. One comes from self-observation, and one comes from observation of other animals. Perhaps it’s unsurprising that they have converged on a similar set of gentle, effective techniques.

I had a lot of reactions while reading the 400 pages of this book. Interest in people’s experiences with meditation and transformation. Boredom with the more esoteric details about Buddhism. Self-judgment about my own meditation experiences. Longing for the support of a meditative community. Relief when reading about self-acceptance.

One section describes the three personality types that cause suffering: grasping, aversive, and deluded. We all have elements of these types, and may lean strongly toward one of them. Fortunately, awareness and acceptance can mitigate the suffering they cause, and even bring positive benefits.

I felt defensive about recognizing the aversive type in myself. Yeah, okay, so I have a strong judgmental voice. At the same time, it’s a relief to realize that lots of people struggle with this. It’s normal, acceptable. The positive side of aversion is discernment.

I recommend this book if you’re interested in a warm, accessible, occasionally dry introduction to Buddhist thought. It can be fascinating to observe your reactions as you read!

Available at bookshop.org.

“The Conquest” by Yxta Maya Murray

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Recommended to me by: Cofax

This layered novel combines plot-driven swashbuckling adventure with a more cerebral battle over the contents and authorship of the historical record.

In the first layer of story, Sara, a proficient rare-book restorer, is absorbed by her work on a sixteenth century manuscript allegedly by a Spanish monk, to the point of ignoring the military man she intends to marry someday. She is convinced the manuscript is historical rather than fictional, and sets out to prove her theory.

The second layer of story is the manuscript itself, describing the adventurous and amorous life of “Helen”, an Aztec princess who is captured during the destruction of her city by Spanish explorers.

The double stories explore the consequences of colonialism on both the national and personal fronts, and bring refreshing perspectives on race and homosexuality.

While swashbuckling adventure and romance are not my favorite genres, the deeper layers made this book well worth reading.

A typesetting footnote, in a book about books: Since I don’t spend a lot of time looking at a book’s cover while I’m reading it, I often find that I don’t remember the title or author’s name a few months later. This book had the author and title at the bottom of alternating pages throughout. Great idea!

Available at bookshop.org.

“What Should I Do with My Life?” by Po Bronson

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Po Bronson sought out hundreds of people’s true stories about answering the question, “What should I do with my life?” He tells 55 of these stories in detail, loosely organized by the issues they were confronting.

I was drawn in by each person’s richly described story, as well as by the underlying story of Po Bronson’s own journey. Rather than providing answers, the book provides a glimpse of how each person approached the question and the process.

From the conclusion:

“Now I know passion is rooted in deeply-felt experiences […] Now I think the choice is in whether to be honest, to ourselves and others, and the rest is more of an uncovering, a peeling away of layers, discovering talents we assumed we didn’t have.”

An enjoyable read, recommended to anyone who is interested in authenticity, transformation, and living well.

Sample chapters at Po Bronson’s website.

Available at bookshop.org.

“Rethinking Thin – The New Science of Weight Loss – and the Myths and Realities of Dieting” by Gina Kolata

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This dry, technical book provides a much-needed survey of scientific results about weight-loss dieting, most of which don’t make it to mainstream media nor public consciousness. Vignettes about the participants in a 2 year dieting study add a veneer of characterization and plot.

Scientifically shown in controlled and reviewed studies:

  • Every body has a preferred weight, within about a 20 pound range.
  • Bodies already at their preferred weight react radically differently to extra calories than bodies below their preferred weight. This is a strong reason for the rebound effect after a weight-loss diet. It is also a refutation of “a calorie is a calorie is a calorie” which is often used to judge people’s food choices and body sizes.
  • Most people find it physically impossible to lose more than 10% of their body weight and keep it off. This is not the result of a character flaw, nor “not trying hard enough.”
  • On average, people who are moderately “overweight” by current standards are healthier and live longer than people who are at or under currently recommended weights. These studies were intensely challenged by many people invested in the obesity “epidemic.”
  • Both increasing height and increasing weight are correlated with more prosperous societies. Perhaps plentiful food allows people to reach the high end of their genetic range for height and weight.

Any book where I start skimming rather than reading doesn’t get posted to this blog. This book narrowly escaped that fate. I did skim a couple of chapters about the history of weight-loss dieting, but the careful scientific reporting drew me back in.

I highly recommend reading this book if you need support to accept your body as it is rather than battling yourself with weight-loss diets.

Available at bookshop.org.

“Tales from Rhapsody Home – Or, What They Don’t Tell You about Senior Living” by John Gould

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John Gould, prolific columnist and writer from small-town Maine, expounds on his life in a retirement home as a nonagenarian.

The textured Maine vocabulary and speech rhythms come through clearly, whether he is documenting his efforts to get some fresh air at night in his new home, or recounting stories from his childhood.

The sense of times gone by is supported by frequent price quotes. 7 cents for a fresh loaf of bread, 6 cents for a stale one for stuffing. An elegant horse-drawn buggy, said to have been custom-built for $700, bought by John Gould’s grandfather for $3 at an estate auction.

Present-day costs at the Rhapsody Home are “steep” and subject to unexpected surcharges. The staff makes no effort to accomodate the elderly residents.

The book is a quick read, funny and bitter by turns. The underlying theme of adjusting to change can apply at any age.

Available at biblio.com.